online dating isn't for the faint-of-heart

Doing a little dating site-surfing. You know, trying to get my money's worth and maybe achieve their 6-month guarantee and even get a refund. Wait. A refund is not the goal of this subscription? Oh well.


Here are a few lowlights from tonight's searches. 

• Him represents the generic dude
• MIM = my inner monologue, or the sassy things I say to the computer while reading these profiles

Him: "hm. what do i want in a relationship?"
MIM: "Someone who will capitalize letters for you?"


Him: "I'm 18 years old now and looking for friends."
MIM: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! *snort*"


Him: "laided back get money serious dude looking for someone whos laide back knows what she want to start a family..."
MIM: "But... it says right on your profile that you already have three kids." (This profile comes with bonus gang hand symbols in the pics. Nice touch.)


Him: "I get all the cable channels. Ha."
MIM: "There's oatmeal in my pantry, too. Not a selling point."


C'mon guys. There's gotta be someone out there who is willing to put up with all of THIS.

This is the face I make when listening to Right Said Fred.