how to surprise the snot out of your sister

This article is dedicated to my brother-in-law, Joey, who is a great co-conspirator, and to my dad, who is not.

Many months ago, my brother-in-law Joey and I started scheming and planning and conspiring to schedule a surprise weekend with Katie and Beep in San Antonio.

I'll save you some reading and skip ahead a few weeks. We pulled it off. Here's how it went down.

wednesday

I caught an early flight to San Antonio via Detroit (or as some of my friends would say, MSN -> DTW -> SAT). Joey met me outside security and we went to the car where he called Katie to see if she was up for meeting him for lunch. She said yes, so Joey and I drove over to the nearby Whole Foods. When she arrived, he walked out to meet her and I approached them when they entered the store.

Katie goes, "What is Siobhan doing here?!?" We hugged, got a little misty-eyed, and generally made a very small and quiet-for-the-Reynolds' scene right there next to the express check-out aisle. Which is to say no shoppers outside a ten-foot radius were alarmed or offended by our presence.

We picked out some grub to eat and share, and found a table by the windows. We chatted for a while before sending Katie back to work for the afternoon.

Joey and I headed straight for the babysitter where we picked up Beep so she could spend the rest of the week at home with us.

This is where it gets good. It's not that I don't love Joey and Katie. I do. Immensely. But I already know them. I'm really just getting to know Beep and saw this as my opportunity to connect with her now that she's (sniffle sniffle) not really a teensy baby anymore.

Joey strapped the baby into her car seat and we cooed at her till arriving at Cabbage Ranch. We put together a snack for her and I spent the rest of the afternoon playing with Beep and her blocks while Joey worked from his home office.

three minutes with me and Beep has a berry-stained chin

I drank some Coors Light -- turns out, it's the most delicious beer on Earth when it's your vacation and there's a cold one in the fridge -- and whipped up a snack for Beep.

that's my niece - the Nalgene baby! 

who loves snacks? WE DO!

Katie finally came home from work and we had FAJITAS for dinner. YUM! We put the baby to bed... and me. I was completely tuckered out after a long day of travel.

thursday

Katie had some long hours to put in, thanks to the board of directors' stupid monthly meeting. That group might be the ONLY one that didn't know about Katie's surprise... other than Katie.

Beep and I had an awesome time together running around the house and yard all morning. We stopped for crackers....

remember, lil' lady, sharing is caring

... and to work with dadda (Joey) on acclimating Annie, the family border collie, to hopping onto the bed of the pickup truck.

good job, Annie!

Since Katie wasn't going to be around for dinner, Joey and I packed up Beep and her (my) sunglasses...

... and hit the road for their favorite Mexican restaurant. Joey told me the story of, well, how General Zapata is his 'granddaddy', making him Beeps great-granddaddy. Which is both funny and not true.

fill 'er up, por favor

After dinner we returned to Cabbage Ranch for chores. This includes wrassling Annie...

how's that for a family resemblance to Monkey?!?

... and feeding and watering two of the horses, Sam and Junior. Beep and Joey enjoyed a few precious moments of quiet together.

there's Sam!

I recommend taking a mental snapshot of this so as to recall it anytime

friday

On Friday morning, Joey and I entertained ourselves and Beep for a few hours in the morning. I ISWACed Joey's work presentation and then Beep and I played with doh-doh (Play-Doh).

in case you needed a reminder... she's the pretties thing ever

And guess who came home early?!? MUFFIN! Well, Katie. Mama. My sister. Beep and Joey and I were so, so excited to spend the rest of the weekend with her. Joey whipped up an amazing indoor-picnic lunch of venison burgers and tater tots! Whoa, yummy.

Since Beep's second birthday party was scheduled for the next day, the grown-ups started preparations in earnest.

Katie put me in charge of power-washing the patios. She left Beep and me alone for THREE MINUTES and this is what happened.

Thank goodness my sister calls this a MEMORY and not a MESS. She could easily have rolled her eyes or scolded me (par for the course...), but instead she ran inside to get a camera.

Back on the driveway, Joey began searing two huge Boston butts...

baby (L) for scale

... in preparation for their overnight in the smoker. His flatbed pick-up truck served as an excellent counter top. Horse shoes held down the aluminum foil.

if they had a neighborhood, it would have smelled amazing

And the three girls donned aprons to start several hours of baking treats to share with friends during the party.

Joey put Beep to bed at a reasonable hour while Katie and I stayed up working different recipes in the kitchen. Egg and sausage souffle (recipe), sugar cookies with sprinkles, cinnamon rolls (trust Martha's weird-ass recipe!), accouterments for tacos, and fruit with a special dip.

I'm not gonna lie. Katie did all the baking. I did all the dishes.

saturday

Early on the morning of Beeps' birthday and the party, Katie knocked lightly on my bedroom door and I hopped out of bed. While still rubbing my eyes, I bumbled down the hallway toward the kitchen, saying, "I'm ready to party."

it's the birthday girl!

Katie had already cleaned the floors so we started scoping out the yard. For a state which endured record-breaking drought and heat less than a year ago, the overnight and early morning weather brought uncharacteristically drippy, misty skies. The patio furniture was sopping wet with little chance of drying off. PLAN B! Party moves indoors.

I blew up balloons, vacuumed, and arranged furniture. Joey ran last-minute errands. Katie got herself, the baby, and the food ready.

They unlocked the gates so guests could easily get to the front door. The gates were unlocked. I repeat, the gates did not have a lock. For two minutes. And the doorbell rang early. Who knew it'd be a creepy mormon lady. It all happened so fast -- the save-my-soul pamphlet and the waist-length braid and floor-length skirt -- that I didn't have time to grab a camera.

but this is pretty much the gist

Beep's wonderful friends and family arrived and shared an awesome morning with us. Her grandpa (no relation to Gen. Zapata) and Mo brought Nikki and her baby. Katie and Joey's friends from the rodeo came with their babies. All told, I bet 25 or more people cycled through the house.

After opening some awesome gifts, the littlest ones and their parents ran outside in the now-clear weather to chase balloons play with sidewalk chalk.

Joey is very good at corralling babies

run, Ruthie, run!

We were all wiped out, so Beep wasn't the only one who took a post-party snoozer. In fact, Joey fell asleep on Beep's brand new Dora the Explorer couch. Snoring and everything.

that is not Beep, but this is the exact couch on which Joey fell asleep

When we woke up, we decided to not do dishes and instead drive into Greune, which is just about the pretties dang town you could ever imagine, and got a table for dinner at the Grist Mill.

say 'queso'!

On Saturnight, after the baby went to bed, Katie and Joey and I sat around the still-warm smoker and drank beers (Katie had water, duh). Joey cranked the country music on his pick-up's stereo and we gazed at the constellations. And we talked and talked and talked and then talked some more.

Joey, Katie, Bhan (L-R)

sunday

Katie had arranged for us to meet up with her friend, Chelsea, who is an amazing photographer. Chelsea spent about 30 minutes taking pictures of Beep alone and with her parents among the exquisite Texas bluebonnets. This fleeting time of year provides families with an incredible backdrop for photos.

I'm certain Chelsea's pictures will turn out lovely and remind us of a very special birthday weekend spent with my sister and her amazing family.

I leave you with this.